Refiner's Fire

Malachi 3:2-3

"2 But who can endure the day of his coming? Who can stand when he appears? For he will be like a refiner’s fire or a launderer’s soap. 3 He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver; he will purify the Levites and refine them like gold and silver. Then the LORD will have men who will bring offerings in righteousness..."




Lesson of the Day: Submit yourself unto the Lord and allow Him to refine you, to burn away all your impurities, so that you may come out pure, clean, without blemish.  Let all the impurities be removed in the heat.  The time in the fire will not be nice to endure, but be assured that everything will work out in the end and in faith you will come out greater, stronger and mightier for the Lord.

Cheaper Vodafone

Just before the new year I was talking about getting a new mobile phone in my upcoming upgrade.  I had always had my eyes on the Samsung Galaxy SII as I wanted to stick with the Android operating system and definitely need a faster phone as my HTC Magic (which is now two-and-a-half years old) is now very old, very slow and definitely lost all of it's magic!  The last time we looked at this I had considered getting the phone through another 18-month contract or buying a sim free handset and getting a cheaper tariff from Vodafone.  So this morning I called up Vodafone to discuss my upgrade options.  They offered me the Samsung Galaxy SII for FREE if I took a 24-month contract with them at my current tariff of £36/ month.  So that meant £864 over two year.  That's a lot of money AND two years is a long time!  Who knows what will happen to my phone then?  I wouldn't want to wait two year before any upgrade options become available.  OR if I took an 18-month contract at the same monthly cost I'd have to pay £64 for the handset.  I tried to ask for the handset to be free, played the loyalty card reminding them I've been with them since 2006.  But no, the system said No.  Haha!  An 18-month contract was reasonable, but I was not happy to pay the extra £64.  The customer service agent (who shall not be named), then advised, that I could take the sim-only contract for only £10.25 a month which will give me the exact same quotas: 600 Anytime Minutes, Unlimited SMS and 500MB data.  And I could buy the handset sim-free elsewhere.  He said a lot of people are doing that these days as it seems the cheaper option out there.  I was so glad to hear this.  £10.25 a month would save me £309 a year on the tariff alone.  All I'd have to do it get myself a sim-free handset and then the phone is all mine and I'd have much greater flexibility with it, like being able to use it in other countries like Singapore for example.  Haha!

So I am happy to say that from midnight tonight my new lower tariff will kick in and I will start saving money.  =P

Seats are taken

Earlier on the week mum and I logged on to Emirates website and we picked our airplane seats for our trip to Singapore.  It was very exciting indeed, especially when also considering whether our seats will be too close the toilets, too near the back or if we're up the front just behind potentially crying babies in their baskinets that hang from the wall.  Haha!  Our seats are sorted for now.  Any changes can still be made later I suppose.  We didn't pick our meals though.  Want to be surprised by what they offer us on the day.  I quite like my airplane meals from my previous flights.  Everything was quite yummy.  Haha!  So.. seats are sorted and we will be flying in August.  But that won't be my only visit to the airport.  I will be taking Cat to the airport in a few weeks time when she flies over to Singapore to see Nick again.  It wasn't that long ago that she complained it was too far away before she went over for her well-deserved break and to sort out wedding stuff etc.  But now it seems not long at all.  Not only that, once Cat is back then the time will countdown till her BIG DAY on 16th July!  My my!  My sister getting married!!  Things are going to be so difference once Cat is married and migrates to Singapore.  The house will be occupied by mum and I and we will miss her.  Must treasure all these moments that she's here with us.  Must treasure the meals that she cooks, must treasure when she cleans the whole bathroom, must treasure all the reduced priced goods she gets from supermarkets for the family, must appreciate all the baking she does.  For it won't be long before these things will no longer exist.  Where there will be one less person to ask me about exercising, about protein shakes, who sends me funny pictures on Whatsapp or share funny jokes with me.  My wee sis all grown up...

Passage of the week

1 Peter 5:6-10

" 6 Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. 7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

 8 Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.

 10 And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. "

Super skint!!

I am now officially super skint!!  Booked the return flights to Singapore last night.  I'll be flying with my mum to attend my sister's wedding banquet at the end of July and it will be a gooood two weeks!  Whoo-hoo!!  Now that the dates are settled it is time to really start saving for the spending money and to cut out all luxuries between now and then!  Can I do it?  Can I revolve my life around work, gym, cinema and church?  I will try!!  =D

So exciting!!

It's You

The first blog post of 2012.  Strange time of quietness after a string of posts from before Christmas.  Truth be told, I was plagued with serious issues since the New Year.  Sometimes history repeats itself.  Sometimes your past can come back and bite you in the behind.  Sometimes things can also happen and you cannot explain why.  But one thing is for sure, there is no perfect person on this Earth.  None but Jesus.  The only person to have walked this Earth who never once sinned or commited any crime or hurt anybody.  For the rest of us, well ..."for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God..." (Romans 3:23).  Nobody is exempt from being hurt or from hurting people.  That is the nature of sin and it affects all of us, everyday.

My recent battle affected my emotionally, psychologically and mentally.  Ok, not psychologically, that sounds a bit dodgy (I am NO psycho!), but yeah definitely emotionally and mentally.  It affected my sleep so much as well that I would lie in bed and toss and turn because my brain was in overdrive, asking myself questions, replaying scenarios, experiences etc.  What the heck!  And this overdrive kept me up, in the dark, with no one to talk to.  And the worse thing was, often those nights were when I tried to sleep in good time for gym the next morning.  So as a result of the broken sleep I would not be able to get up in time for the gym, or woke up to see bloodshot eyes in the mirror and then gave up and opted for the bed as a safer option.  I had to listen to my sleep deprived body.  My training was affected all last week, which meant this battle affected me emotionally, mentally and physically.  Really, it was terrible.

I am truly thankful to the trusted confidence of a Christian brother whom I can spit everything out to (not literally!).  Spilling the beans provides a way of release that is hard to explain.  Receiving some empathetic Godly counselling really helps too.  Prayers are good and I needed them throughout my battle.  But having someone listen is like so amazing that I think Catholic brothers can agree with me when it's a bit like Catholic confessions.  Just having someone listen to you.  Don't have to say much, but let you tell everything.  It's really cool.  I am very thankful for it.  Ok, I am going round circles saying the same thing.  Haha!  Anyway, after yesterday's Godly counsel and later prayer, I left with the burden lifted off me.  My head raised up higher and I can see God clearer again.

God provided a way for me to find another truth within what was happening and once the truth was revealed, again I found another sense of release with a sense of relief.  There is goodness in this world after all.  Yup, there is definitely hope in humanity.  Whilst God is around us, there is always hope!

This afternoon, whilst on a driving lesson, I smiled my first smile for this year.  Yes, my first genuine from-the-heart smile.  Everything up to now has been forced, has been faked to cover up what I was feeling inside, but this afternoon it was as if the skies cleared up, and everything was "all as it should be".  I guess a sense of God's peace bestowed upon me.  It was amazing!  =)

The song above is called "It's You" by Parachute Band.  I came to know it through EM worship, both singing it and playing it whilst serving.  Initially to me the chorus sounded more like an ordinary love song singing about "it's you, only you" etc.  Even when I was playing this song on guitar, I felt like it was a love song for those loved up people there.  However, during my time of darkness I had this song playing in my car (among other Christian songs) and this song really struck my heart when I sang along to it and thought of the words I was singing.  The lyrics are amazing if you read/ listen to them.  The song is about total surrender to God, asking God to break down our walls, as we give him our all and how He wants our whole life.  The chorus really made me cry, but I really had to hold back the tears because I was driving towards a driving lesson.  The chorus: "It's You, only You, who can see beyond the pain.  Only You, who has made a way."  Man, on several occasions I could not sing these words without welling up and stopping midway.  Those words really described me and what I was going through.  Nobody would understand but God.  The second verse asks God to take our plans away as we humble our hearts to Him.  Definitely something I aim for this year.

For the year 2012 I really want a year of total surrender to God.  I have made so many plans for my own life thus far.  For 28 years I have hopes and dreams and desires which I wish to follow and make happen for myself.  Some have "succeeded", some have failed.  Along the way I have learnt very valuable lessons, but at the same time there have been lots of hurt involved as well, both for myself and others.  So I want this year to be a year I reestablish a much stronger relationship with God.  I want Him to take control of all areas of my life: my career, my health, my family, my relationships, my friendships and my servanthood to Him.  Let me walk each day seeking God first and put His plans as priority over mine.  Nobody is more important than God.

I therefore want to use this song "It's You" as the theme tune for my year 2012.  I'd like to end by sharing the lyrics of this song so you may read / sing along.  I hope everyone is having a good year so far and feel blessed by the Lord everyday.

IT'S YOU - PARACHUTE BAND

VERSE 1
TAKE DOWN THESE WALLS
TAKE DOWN THIS PRIDE
TAKE DOWN THE STRENGTH I’VE BUILT INSIDE

VERSE 2
HERE ARE MY FEARS
THIS IS MY SHAME
THIS IS THE ME I’VE HID AWAY

PRE CHORUS
ALL YOU DESIRE, IS ALL OF MY LIFE

CHORUS
IT’S YOU, ONLY YOU
WHO CAN SEE BEYOND THE PAIN
ONLY YOU
WHO HAS MADE A WAY

VERSE 3
TAKE DOWN THESE PLANS
I’VE MADE ON MY OWN
I HUMBLE MYSELF BEFORE YOUR THRONE

VERSE 4
FLOOD THROUGH MY HEART
BREATHE INTO MY SOUL
RUSH INTO ME AND MAKE ME WHOLE

BRIDGE
BREAK DOWN THESE WALLS
BREAK DOWN MY BRIDE
HERE I AM, HERE I AM
BREAK DOWN THESE WALLS
AS I WALK IN YOUR LIGHT
HERE I AM, HERE I AM